American viewers may be more familiar with this game under the title James Bond: The Stealth Affair, since for some reason the American version had the actual James Bond license while everywhere else got a thinly disguised version. Perhaps this only seems strange to me living in a new, internet-fueled age of globalisation. Maybe Ian Fleming's estate was planning on releasing a shitty adventure game of their own, but were planning to withhold it from the US because an American widdled on their cat.
Friday, March 1, 2013
A Wealth Of Stealth
Yes, Gabriel and I did another LP to celebrate him not ejaculating into any more handbags since the last one. This time it's Operation Stealth, by Delphine Software, who also did the lovely Future Wars.
American viewers may be more familiar with this game under the title James Bond: The Stealth Affair, since for some reason the American version had the actual James Bond license while everywhere else got a thinly disguised version. Perhaps this only seems strange to me living in a new, internet-fueled age of globalisation. Maybe Ian Fleming's estate was planning on releasing a shitty adventure game of their own, but were planning to withhold it from the US because an American widdled on their cat.
American viewers may be more familiar with this game under the title James Bond: The Stealth Affair, since for some reason the American version had the actual James Bond license while everywhere else got a thinly disguised version. Perhaps this only seems strange to me living in a new, internet-fueled age of globalisation. Maybe Ian Fleming's estate was planning on releasing a shitty adventure game of their own, but were planning to withhold it from the US because an American widdled on their cat.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Eff Tee Ell
Some necessary background: FTL: Faster Than Light is an indie game on Steam in which you have to manage a spaceship's crew and power functions as it makes its way to home base to warn of a coming rebel fleet. It's very absorbing and I've been playing it a lot lately. Recently I wrote a poem about it. Here it is.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
didn't sleep well
Go to www.teamfortress.com. There's an image at the top of the page showing the 9 different characters. When you mouse over each character they become highlighted, indicating that they can be clicked on to go to their profile page.
And if you very slowly move the mouse cursor from one character to another, you'll find there's a tiny little gap as you cross from one character to the next. A brief moment when both characters become de-highlighted. Like there's a little channel separating the hotspots. This happens everywhere where one character's graphic joins another.
BUT.
There is one exception: the join between the Scout and the Soldier. If you mouse over and highlight the Scout and slowly scroll over to the Soldier, or vice versa, one highlights and the other simultaneously de-highlights. There is no separating border where both become de-highlighted.
If you mouse over the Scout and move to the Pyro, the gap is there. If you mouse over the Soldier and move to the Engineer, the gap is there. If you mouse over any other character and move to its next-door neighbour, every single time, there is a gap. It's just between the Scout and Soldier where there is no gap. It is impossible to position your mouse between them without highlighting either.
WHAT
DOES
THIS
MEAN
And if you very slowly move the mouse cursor from one character to another, you'll find there's a tiny little gap as you cross from one character to the next. A brief moment when both characters become de-highlighted. Like there's a little channel separating the hotspots. This happens everywhere where one character's graphic joins another.
BUT.
There is one exception: the join between the Scout and the Soldier. If you mouse over and highlight the Scout and slowly scroll over to the Soldier, or vice versa, one highlights and the other simultaneously de-highlights. There is no separating border where both become de-highlighted.
If you mouse over the Scout and move to the Pyro, the gap is there. If you mouse over the Soldier and move to the Engineer, the gap is there. If you mouse over any other character and move to its next-door neighbour, every single time, there is a gap. It's just between the Scout and Soldier where there is no gap. It is impossible to position your mouse between them without highlighting either.
WHAT
DOES
THIS
MEAN
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Merlin' In A Winter Wonderland
Merry Christmas, viewers. Here's a present for you: Gabriel finally managed to dislodge his thumb from its usual comfort zone (up his butt) to record a gameplay video of Young Merlin. Then we jabbered over it, as is our funny little way, for the benefit of any other total saddoes who have nothing better to do throughout the Christmas season than watch Youtube videos.
The game turned out to be a bit slow and backtracky, so our conversation had a slightly unfortunate tendency to drift back to cocks a lot.
UPDATE 26/12: Events shudder messily to a climax!
The game turned out to be a bit slow and backtracky, so our conversation had a slightly unfortunate tendency to drift back to cocks a lot.
UPDATE 23/12: Things only gets worse in part two!
UPDATE 26/12: Events shudder messily to a climax!
Friday, October 19, 2012
Green X And Com
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Strawberry Fields Forever
So, the release of my new book is very very soon. In case anyone missed it, I wrote a little survival guide to being trapped in a Jam situation for the Dark Horse blog. Here's a little taster:
Q. Is there any protection from the jam?
A. First of all, the suggestion that peanut butter might counteract the jam has long stopped being funny.
It has been observed that absorbable substances (vegetable matter, wood, organic fabrics, flesh, etc.) can be safely immersed in the jam if they are completely sealed in an unabsorbable substance (metal, stone, plastic, molten lava, etc.). Wrapping your limbs in several layers of plastic bags may provide enough protection to recover vital objects from the jam, such as prescription medication. Citizens doing so, however, must accept full responsibility for any subsequent downturn in fortune and/or bodily mass.
The only surefire protection from the jam is to remain indoors, at least one story above ground level, in a nonwooden building.
Q. I was in a wooden building, outdoors, or on the ground floor at the moment the jam arrived. What can I do?
A. You are currently dead. Since you are reading this, we would like to suggest that you resolve whatever issues of the flesh keep you fettered to the mortal realm.
For more advice to live by, click here for the full article.
Q. Is there any protection from the jam?
A. First of all, the suggestion that peanut butter might counteract the jam has long stopped being funny.
It has been observed that absorbable substances (vegetable matter, wood, organic fabrics, flesh, etc.) can be safely immersed in the jam if they are completely sealed in an unabsorbable substance (metal, stone, plastic, molten lava, etc.). Wrapping your limbs in several layers of plastic bags may provide enough protection to recover vital objects from the jam, such as prescription medication. Citizens doing so, however, must accept full responsibility for any subsequent downturn in fortune and/or bodily mass.
The only surefire protection from the jam is to remain indoors, at least one story above ground level, in a nonwooden building.
Q. I was in a wooden building, outdoors, or on the ground floor at the moment the jam arrived. What can I do?
A. You are currently dead. Since you are reading this, we would like to suggest that you resolve whatever issues of the flesh keep you fettered to the mortal realm.
For more advice to live by, click here for the full article.
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