Monday, November 4, 2013

Splash back

Hello! I'm still alive! Here's a video Gabriel and I did in which we play Flashback very badly.

Friday, September 20, 2013

That's A Panelling

Ahoy there, occasional readers. As some of you may know, the Escapist Expo is coming up again (October 4-6th in Durham, NC just like last time) and I'm going to be flying all the way out there again for it. But I'm not going to be there just to sit in a tree cupping myself, ho no, I've got panels to do.

There's a full list of scheduled panels now been put up here, which you should definitely check out in full 'cos there's a lot of neat stuff I'm going to miss 'cos I have to go be sparkling somewhere else, but since this is my blog that you're still psychotically checking regularly for updates that never seem to come, here's a list of just the ones I'm on. Hope to see y'all there.


The Escapist Q&A
You get to ask all of the Escapist contributors whatever you want. This Q&A session will start with a few introductions, but then we’ll jump right into handing the mic over to you to ask your heart’s desire. Why doesn’t Yahtzee wear his hat anymore? What does Jim think about sandwiches? Does Lisa Foiles wear boxers or briefs? Now’s your chance to ask! (We will be having three sessions of this Q&A over the weekend so don’t worry if you miss one.)

Participants:
Yahtzee Croshaw
Bob Chipman
Gavin Dunne
Dan Epstein
Chris Pranger
Lisa Foiles
Mark J Kline
Graham Stark
Paul Saunders
Jim Sterling
Greg Tito

Location: 
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Fri, Oct 4, 2013 3:00 PM
Sat, Oct 5, 2013 3:00 PM
Sun, Oct 6, 2013 3:00 PM


How to Create an Online Cult, er, Following
The internet is a fickle mistress, but when plied with social media and shameless plugs, she can bring great success. The internet celebrities discuss how they’ve expanded the reach of their empire through the use of self-promotion. Or how it all kind of just happened by an enormous stroke of luck.

Participants:
Graham Stark
Paul Saunders
Yahtzee Croshaw
Joshua Ovenshire
Greg Tito

Location:
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Fri, Oct 4, 2013 10:30 AM


The Hour of Love 2 – The Revenge
Say something positive about quick time events. Go! Last year we asked the audience to come up with short, one phrase topics, and present them to Jim Sterling and Yahtzee, forcing them to express anything good about the subject. Dr. Mark would then judge the two notorious curmudgeons to see if they were able to be as loving as possible. We’re bringing back the format for this Expo, so please bring your dastardly trap-topics. Please, no one mention Aliens: Colonial Marines.

Participants: 
 Yahtzee Croshaw
Mark J Kline
Jim Sterling
Greg Tito

Location:
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Fri, Oct 4, 2013 4:30 PM


The Big Picture Quiz Show with MovieBob & Friends
MovieBob will test the knowledge of his fellow Escapists with a one-of-a-kind quiz show! We've picked the contestants, Bob is holding the questions - most culled directly from the over 150 episodes of “The Big Picture”... but YOU get to help decide which category the questions will come from! Movies, Comics, TV, Games, the power is in your hands. PLUS! If none of our esteemed contestants can answer a question, a lucky audience member might get a chance to try and maybe win a fabulous prize!

Participants:
Yahtzee Croshaw
Lisa Foiles
Chris Pranger
Graham Stark
Bob Chipman

Location:
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Sat, Oct 5, 2013 12:00 PM


No Right Answer – The Escapists DebateThere’s nothing quite like demanding people to state their opinion on meaningless pop-culture items. Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw, Bob “Movie Bob” Chipman, Graham Stark, Chris Pranger, and Dan Epstein join forces for what could possibly be the greatest series of debates since the dawn of time. We’ll start out using fan suggestions to debate in the style of the wildly popular “Who Would Win?” episodes of No Right Answer. Then the main event; A feature debate where panelists split into teams, and tag in when they have a killer point to make. If you’ve ever wanted to see Yahtzee and Movie Bob get into a shouting match, you’re welcome to attend and watch the magic unfold.

Participants:
Bob Chipman
Yahtzee Croshaw
Graham Stark
Dan Epstein
Chris Pranger

Location: 
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Sat, Oct 5, 2013 4:30 PM


The Most Wonderful Games We’ve Never MadeGame designers talk about the best game ideas they had that never got made, for one reason or another. Or the game they've always wanted to make, but never did. Or, the game they heard about someone else making that never surfaced. There will be a lot secrets divulged, skeletons dug up, and bad ideas left to dry.

Participants:
Yahtzee Croshaw
Richard Dansky
Randy Greenback
Jonathan Bolding

Location:
DCC Meeting Rooms 3-4

Date:
Sun, Oct 6, 2013 10:30 AM


Game of the Year
2013 may not be over yet, but that doesn’t mean we can’t start talking about our favorite game of the year. What title should hold the honor? Is it a shooter? An RPG? Or should we surprise everyone and give it to Madden? The panel will discuss what they think about the games they’ve played this year and nominate their early pick for Game of the Year.

Participants:
Yahtzee Croshaw
Jim Sterling
Gavin Dunne
David Moss
Andrea Rene

Location:
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date:
Sun, Oct 6, 2013 12:00 PM


Your Game Idea is Bollocks/Brilliant – Pitch It Anyway
You think you got a great idea for a video game? Come to the panel and pitch it to our illustrious panel of game developers and critics, and we’ll tell you whether you are a crazy son of a bitch or a game design genius. There’s no middle ground - it’s either bollocks or brilliant. You have 30 seconds to explain your game idea, so make it count!

Participants:
Yahtzee Croshaw
Jim Sterling
Chris Hazard
David Moss
Greg Tito

Location: 
Fletcher Hall at the Carolina Theatre

Date: 
Sun, Oct 6, 2013 4:30 PM

Sunday, July 14, 2013

What Passes For Normal

Oh blimey it's been a while since I uploaded an adventure game LP video. In this case it's because Gabriel picked a CD-ROM DOS game from the mid-90's, one of those ones that are notoriously hard to play on modern PCs because they're held together with chewing gum and hope, and I understand he had a devil of a time recording the thing.









But his loss is our two-faced back-handed gain. Yes, it's Normality, a hilarious game about a complete tosser wandering around fighting an oppressive future society which is, in many ways, not oppressive enough.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

And Incidentally

Time for a super-secret DVD bonus extra that only readers of my personal blog will discover. In case you missed this week's Rhymedown Spectacular, you can see it here. My contribution this week was a poem highlighting the inherent absurdity of a console, a luxury item trying to persuade us to buy it, being a long list of 'can'ts', you can't play old games, you can't play without an account etc.

Originally the poem was more of a dig at the Xbox One specifically, but the day after I wrote it, the huge Microsoft DRM backtrack happened, so I had to hurriedly reword some bits and delete two verses to make the poem more about addressing the general issues that all the consoles have to greater and lesser degrees.

But for the record, here are the two verses I cut:

You can't play games that were bought second-hand
And you can't play games that you borrow
And you can't complain that this causes you pain
'Cos we're running a business, y'know

You can't play unless there's an online connection
And a fast one at that – in your house
And you can't play unless it checked in today
Like a needy emotional spouse

Wow, lucky I did cut those, Microsoft might have brought arson charges against me if I'd unleashed burnsauce that potent.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Poetry Corner

So if you're wondering where I've been lately, it's been mainly juggling projects. Projects such as new video series. New video series such as this one:




If you enjoyed my FTL poem and that one ZP I did yonks ago entirely in limericks, you should realise that writing within a rhyme and rhythm structure is something that seems to hold appeal for me. So I wanted to flex it a bit, and when the Escapist mentioned they were looking into starting some new video content, I ran the FTL video past them. Well, it turns out Jim Sterling (of Jimquisition) was thinking along similar lines, so now we're doing a weekly poetry slam, on whatever video gaming topics come to mind.

The other thing that appeals to me about the concept is that it can be done a lot quicker than a Zero Punctuation, so I can be a bit more topical with the humour. Ho yes, I'll never be caught short by a news trend again. Last thing I need is something like Margaret Thatcher dying and me not noticing.

Friday, March 1, 2013

A Wealth Of Stealth

Yes, Gabriel and I did another LP to celebrate him not ejaculating into any more handbags since the last one. This time it's Operation Stealth, by Delphine Software, who also did the lovely Future Wars.





American viewers may be more familiar with this game under the title James Bond: The Stealth Affair, since for some reason the American version had the actual James Bond license while everywhere else got a thinly disguised version. Perhaps this only seems strange to me living in a new, internet-fueled age of globalisation. Maybe Ian Fleming's estate was planning on releasing a shitty adventure game of their own, but were planning to withhold it from the US because an American widdled on their cat.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Eff Tee Ell

Some necessary background: FTL: Faster Than Light is an indie game on Steam in which you have to manage a spaceship's crew and power functions as it makes its way to home base to warn of a coming rebel fleet. It's very absorbing and I've been playing it a lot lately. Recently I wrote a poem about it. Here it is.