Sunday, October 7, 2012

Strawberry Fields Forever

So, the release of my new book is very very soon. In case anyone missed it, I wrote a little survival guide to being trapped in a Jam situation for the Dark Horse blog. Here's a little taster:

Q. Is there any protection from the jam?

A. First of all, the suggestion that peanut butter might counteract the jam has long stopped being funny.

It has been observed that absorbable substances (vegetable matter, wood, organic fabrics, flesh, etc.) can be safely immersed in the jam if they are completely sealed in an unabsorbable substance (metal, stone, plastic, molten lava, etc.). Wrapping your limbs in several layers of plastic bags may provide enough protection to recover vital objects from the jam, such as prescription medication. Citizens doing so, however, must accept full responsibility for any subsequent downturn in fortune and/or bodily mass.

The only surefire protection from the jam is to remain indoors, at least one story above ground level, in a nonwooden building.

Q. I was in a wooden building, outdoors, or on the ground floor at the moment the jam arrived. What can I do?

A. You are currently dead. Since you are reading this, we would like to suggest that you resolve whatever issues of the flesh keep you fettered to the mortal realm.


For more advice to live by, click here for the full article.

48 comments:

  1. Shush, I'm listening to you read Mogworld again!

    ReplyDelete
  2. So alright, I've been a bad fan and am only getting around to getting Mogworld. Have you perchance looked at how much Mogworld is going for on US Amazon pages? You should, just for a laugh. You'll either be paying $8ish used, or perhaps $43 new - and then there're the 13 offerings over $100 - many of them in the $900 range. Something is up in the Amazon seller's market for Mogworld, no idea what. (Is there some sort of publishing apocolypse I haven't heard about? I mean besides the ebook business that's got printing in a snit.)

    So of course I went and pre-ordered Jam. Because signs suggest that that's the best thing to do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was thinking they were autographed copies, what with the Expo & all... but no. I'm guessing a combination of renewed interest and normal business practices are the cause.

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  3. That... wasn't all that hilarious, to be honest.

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  4. so much for peanut butter based warfare *sigh*
    ah well still looking forward to the new book :D

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  5. As the credits whizzed by on your - can I say this without sounding like a puff - fabulous review of 'FIFA 13' I decided that I should actually pause and read what the hell it was they said.

    Which was a long way of saying, I am glad I found your blog. Before coming here it seemed that buying a copy of 'Mogworld' would keep me from being able to feed myself for a week. I've now ordered 'Mogworld' and pre-ordered 'Jam.'

    Cheers!

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